You can call her Epic

For those of you who don't know her (and many of you don't which is shameful), I'd like to introduce Marianne at We Band of Mothers.  She is a hilarious (mommy) blogger from my fave city, Chicago, where they talk like me. 

In my best Chicago voice (via e-mail), I asked her a few "burning" questions:

You’re married to a fireman. On a scale of 1-10, how hot is that?
It truly never gets old. Although I do believe Joe gets a bit sick of hearing “Can you please put on your suspenders and boots one more time tonight, honey?” Dirty, dirty Marianne.


Do you ever slip and call your boys Robbie, Chip & Ernie?
Nah. I forgot my kids’ names years ago. I call them all “Jesus Christ.”


Beer or wine?
Yes.


Judging from all your bridesmaid pics, you are pretty tall. How’s that working for you?
I love being tall in that I never need to ask for help to get things down from the top shelf. Also, an extra 30 pounds on me simply looks like PMS bloat. The bad part? People always remember the 6 foot tall giant. Sadly, I recognize NOBODY. My go-to line? “Oh, hello, you.” It’s embarrassing.


My friend Kerry from HouseTalkN is really tall, too. Is it an Illinois thing?
Absolutely. We pump our cows full of growth hormones here in the Great Midwest. If you actually manage to not hit 6 feet, people assume a milk allergy.


What is the gang activity like on the Southside, and do you have a secret handshake?
There is GANG ACTIVITY on the southside of Chicago?? Crap. We’re moving.


Perogies or Pizza?
Hello? I’m from Chicago. We have a name for people who eat perogies. We call them “People Not From Chicago.” Whether it’s deep dish or thin crust (cut in squares), Chicago pizza is the best.


If you could vacation anywhere in the world, where would it be?
I would love to do The Sound of Music Tour in Salzburg. I visited my friend years ago when she was getting her international business degree in Switzerland. Being a huge theater geek, I was dying to re-live a day in the life of Maria von Trapp. My friend mocked me, called me a loser, and insisted we train it to Paris instead. Yet two months later? She went on The Sound of Music tour without me! She phoned to say it was the most fabulous thing EVER. There were trolleys full of drunkards who would spin around atop mountains and belt out The Hills are Alive at the top of their lungs. I deserved to be one of those drunkards. As God as my witness, I will be one of those drunkards someday.


And now a question for the DIY/Home Décor Bloggers, because it’s killing them that we haven’t mentioned anything house-related even ONCE! Here goes: how would you describe your decorating style?
Decorating? Um. I take all the cast-off furniture and stuff that people give me and strew it awkwardly about my house. Then I wait for my older brother to visit and mock me for having no spatial eye whatsoever. I also visit home décor bloggers to make friends. I’m secretly hoping one of them comes over eventually to fix things out of sheer pity.


Would you like to give a shout-out to another fellow blogger so that I might be able to harass her into doing an interview?
This is hard. I read and love a LOT of blogs. This is like picking a favorite child. I’m going to have to go with Lillian from It’s a Dome Life because she’s the only person I know who writes hilarious stories of social awkwardness, paints portraits of guinea pigs, and manages to be the biggest cheerleader out there for women of the blogosphere. I kinda love her.


As an aside, I would like to thank Kirby for inviting me to participate in this tremendously fun Q&A. Nobody ever invites me anywhere because I usually break things and swear. I feel very fortunate that someone with such obvious taste and style allows me to be a part of their elegant and beautiful world. And should we ever meet face-to-face, I promise to stay far away from the crystal. I love you, Kirby!!  

Kirby here: I love you too, Mar!  And next time I visit Chicago, I will buy you beer and pizza.  But I won't decorate your house.